More Precious Time With You

(August 16, 2011)


So many of the deepest friendships I’ve ever had are all the way over in Cheyenne, Wyoming.
Others are all the way over in Oregon, Europe, Kansas, Florida, Australia, and simply other parts of Missouri.
Some of them joined the military or are otherwise all over the place.
One of even them lives in the same household I do.
And to every single one of these treasured connections I want to say, “I wish I had spent more time with you.”
“I am going to love you. For what we’ve shared I will love you.”

Most of my immediate family lives only a mere few miles away.
My mother lives only a mere few miles away.
Other, more distant family members live mostly in other parts of Missouri and in Massachusetts.
My father lives all the way over in Massachusetts.
And to every single one of these cherished blood ties I want to say, “I wish I had spent more time with you.”
“I am going to love you. As simple as that, I will love you.”

Most of these people I see only occasionally, sometimes woefully fleetingly, always regretfully out of my control.
Some I see only in multiples of years, some every year, as distance takes its toll on short-lived opportunity.
Some I see every few months, some every few weeks, as opportunity takes its toll on aching desire.
Some I see practically every day, but not necessarily see, as desire takes its toll from unfortunate circumstance.
And to every single one of these valued visitors/visited I want to say, “I wish I had spent more time with you.”
“I am going to love you. For better or worse I will love you.”

The only true romantic love I’ve ever known is thousands of miles away.
In fact, as lame as it sounds, the only true relationship I’ve ever known is thousands of miles away.
Perhaps the hole that has been left inside of me was left so deeply and so abruptly it’s kept its shape.
Perhaps only the same piece will ever fill it up again. Perhaps the best is yet to come.
To this forever-loved and remembered person, I want to say, “I wish I had spent more time with you.”
I am going to love you. Even when it hurts I will love you.”

And so, to every last person who’s ever positively touched my life, I just want to say,

“I wish I had spent more time with you. And I hope I get to spend more precious time with you.

¦]

Posted by Eli Stanley | at 10:33 PM

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